Thursday, July 30, 2009

Some deep thoughts...

This week, I've realized I must have totally missed the
MOM MD course.
When was that offered and where was I?
Last week, McClain ran a pretty high fever for three days. The doctor at the walk-in clinic couldn't find anything wrong, and the nurse acted like I was a quack for asking if he was contagious. Then two days ago, we found four HUGE new molars in the boy's mouth...and four in his brother's mouth! This also explains the completely unnecessary amounts ornery behavior of late! Why didn't I know they got molars at 3?
Today I found myself in another "why didn't I catch this sooner" situation. Cloe had her six year check up and completely bombed the eye exam. So much so, the doctor wondered how she had even passed kindergarten. There were six lines to read and she could only see the top two. We are headed to an optometrist tomorrow to get her fixed up with some cute specks. I'm crushed that we just put the poor girl through two months of intensive reading tutoring when she couldn't even see the letters...no wonder reading isn't coming easy. I am totally in awe of her progress in light of this news, though! What a trooper--never a single complaint, only excitement to get up early every morning during the summer for reading school! I love that girl!
These mothering moments that leave pits in my stomach take me right back to the pit in my stomach and the darkness I felt in the weeks after my babies were born. Some call it postpartum depression. I call it my dark time. (*I never want my children to think that because of them, I had depression. They are my treasures and my gifts! That's just a total editorial comment!) The pit wouldn't go away, the tears wouldn't stop...it was awful!
I remember so clearly crying out to God to restore my joy! Thankfully, I wasn't alone. God had placed people in my life like my awesome sister who would call me just to see if I was crying and other friends who would check up on me. Cody was also so incredibly supportive and went to great lengths to help me through the dark time. Because of God's grace, I made it through...joy fully restored, grace at work!
You probably heard about this accident last Sunday. When the name was released, another pit hit my stomach. A different sort of pit. This gal and her husband had been my Sunday School teachers my freshman year of college. I knew her. It crushed me to know that she had left four children behind. It also crushed me that she must have desperately needed help. Did she have a sister? Was her husband aware? News has been passed along that she had been suffering from postpartum depression for 13 years. .:How.awful:.
It's almost inevitable that we are going to face dark times, trials in our lives. I long to share the grace that pulls that dark cloud away and replaces it with joy! I long to see people experience a relationship with Christ that brings them out of the darkness and into a life lived not in their own strength but in His.

Isaac Watts, a hymn writer in the 1700's, penned a hymn from 2 Corinthians 12:7, 9-10.
Our own weakness, and Christ our strength.

Let me but hear my Savior say,
“Strength shall be equal to thy day,”
Then I rejoice in deep distress,
Leaning on all-sufficient grace.

I glory in infirmity,
That Christ’s own power may rest on me:
When I am weak, then am I strong,
Grace is my shield, and Christ my song.

I can do all things, or can bear
All suff’rings, if my Lord be there;
Sweet pleasures mingle with the pains,
While his left hand my head sustains.

But if the Lord be once withdrawn,
And we attempt the work alone,
When new temptations spring and rise,
We find how great our weakness is.


This hymn has been reworked and updated by two guys that work with Sojourn Music. They have amazing stuff! You can listen to it here...and you should, really!

So, because I have the privilege of being married to the hot music pastor at our church...yes, I just called him hot...I'll be singing this next Sunday. No, I'm not a great singer, but the message is great! Whatever dark time you're in...God's grace is waiting...lean!

May Your Power Rest on Me

Written by Joel Gerdis and Neil Robins

Let me hear my Savior say,
“Your strength shall return”.
Then I’ll rejoice in my weakness
As I lean on your grace,
As I lean on your grace.


Chorus:
May your power rest on me.
You are strong when I am weak.
I can bear all things when temptation springs
For you sustain me all my days.


Let me know my Savior’s face;
Let my hope be secure.
Then I’ll rejoice in my weakness
As I lean on your grace,
As I lean on your grace.


Chorus:
May your power rest on me.
You are strong when I am weak.
I can bear all things when temptation springs
For you sustain me all my days.


Once from the Lord withdrawn
I thought that I could live my life alone.
Leaving the solid ground
I sank beneath His wisdom.
The harder I tried to climb,
The closer I was to find how great is my weakness.


Chorus:
May your power rest on me.
You are strong when I am weak.
I can bear all things when temptation springs
For you sustain me all my days.


Though the trial still goes on,
Your grace will be my song.
For I can bear all things when temptation springs
For you sustain me all my days.

1 comments:

une autre mère said...

Thanks for sharing this Londa. The words to those hymns are so powerful. Isn't it great to have a God who actually cares about us and is there to wrap his arms around us in our dark times? I'm so sorry about your friend's accident. That is so sad.

I'm looking forward to you singing Sunday! You always do such a great job and the song sounds beautiful.